Life is beautiful.
Fragile and nebulously so.
Some days and moments just rush in the good feeling, pushing past your daily grind, past your jaded cynicism, past your world weariness to tinge all the everyday things and people with a special color to put that smile on your face.
Just you.
Your shoulders relax albeit slowly, your feet stretch and your smile broadens and you are just happy. Just plain happy. No reasons. There is a singing in your heart that has no history. Nothing special and yet very special just because it is so intensely full. It feels good to be alive. You are acutely aware of the sights, sounds and colours of life around you. You are rooted in the awareness of the moment and in touch with it. All questions and pain seem dull, differences and conflicts forgotten and thrust in a corner for the moment. Music playing somewhere adding its rightness to the moment. So do the odd snatches of silence. Blessed content silence. Friends seem to reach out adding a unique flavor. A loved one calls and the moment is flavored some more , peppered with humour and warmth. The moment is so perfect holding all the promise of life and love that it can possibly hold.
I hug this special moment. I know not what the next moment would bring. But this moment? This moment is mine to savour, to pass on, and to share. What do I care about the next when I have been blessed with this moment so full?
Life is heady indeed.
---- Srividya Srinivasan July 26, 2010
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Tuesday, July 06, 2010
I cannot follow you ...
I am sorry.
I have no role model.
No gurus.
No companions to hold my hand.
Yes, I can read about your journey.
And the journeys of the Buddhas and the sadhus.
The pious, the agnostic, the rationalist and the intellect,
the profound and the profane,
the free spirit and the disciplinarian,
the madman and the seer.
But in the end you see,
It is your journey and theirs, not mine.
Within me, only I can journey.
How can i ever comprehend the quality of your journey?
How can i but not question the credibility of your truth ?
It is not my truth.
It is not my truth until I can feel it in my bones,
until it stems from the very core of my being and belief,
until it rules every conviction of mine,
and goes past that to overpower my very existence.
My journey and only my journey matters to me.
My truth and only my truth can be the truth for me.
I exist only in me.
I can think you exist.
I am even sure you do.
But you see,
you exist as what I can see you as.
You exist as a reflection of my truth.
Of my comprehension of you.
You exist as how my life has taught me to see you.
Go your journey dearest in search of your truth if you will.
But do not ask me why i have no role models.
Call it my arrogance or your ignorance,
Be shocked at my honesty in only acknowledging my truth as the highest.
Or the fact that my truth changes as my perceptions do.
My truth will be MY highest as only I can stand by it.
You are free to stand by your truth.
But, do not be angered because I can believe harder in my truth
and that I am neither overpowered by yours nor willing to bow my head to it.
Instead raise your conviction of your truth to match my conviction in mine.
So that our individual truths can set us free and light a flame in the other.
Together we shall then walk hand in hand.
Two free individuals sharing our varied journeys.
-- Srividya Srinivasan - 6.7.2010
I have no role model.
No gurus.
No companions to hold my hand.
Yes, I can read about your journey.
And the journeys of the Buddhas and the sadhus.
The pious, the agnostic, the rationalist and the intellect,
the profound and the profane,
the free spirit and the disciplinarian,
the madman and the seer.
But in the end you see,
It is your journey and theirs, not mine.
Within me, only I can journey.
How can i ever comprehend the quality of your journey?
How can i but not question the credibility of your truth ?
It is not my truth.
It is not my truth until I can feel it in my bones,
until it stems from the very core of my being and belief,
until it rules every conviction of mine,
and goes past that to overpower my very existence.
My journey and only my journey matters to me.
My truth and only my truth can be the truth for me.
I exist only in me.
I can think you exist.
I am even sure you do.
But you see,
you exist as what I can see you as.
You exist as a reflection of my truth.
Of my comprehension of you.
You exist as how my life has taught me to see you.
Go your journey dearest in search of your truth if you will.
But do not ask me why i have no role models.
Call it my arrogance or your ignorance,
Be shocked at my honesty in only acknowledging my truth as the highest.
Or the fact that my truth changes as my perceptions do.
My truth will be MY highest as only I can stand by it.
You are free to stand by your truth.
But, do not be angered because I can believe harder in my truth
and that I am neither overpowered by yours nor willing to bow my head to it.
Instead raise your conviction of your truth to match my conviction in mine.
So that our individual truths can set us free and light a flame in the other.
Together we shall then walk hand in hand.
Two free individuals sharing our varied journeys.
-- Srividya Srinivasan - 6.7.2010
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